Mathematicians, Daggers and Leprechauns
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Last night, as my fellow graduate students were passing around pieces of pie in our Quantitative Methods Analysis class--a course we love to hate-- I started thinking about the randomness of some U.S. holidays. Just one glimpse of the "National Day Calendar" and you'll agree that we celebrate some pretty ridiculous things around here.
In fact, here's a day-by-day list for the month of March. This is a 'Blogger's Choice' list meaning that I'm the blogger and get to pick which random holidays are funny. Keep in mind, I'm weeding out a bunch of designations as I do this and merely listing one per day:
March 1st Nat'l Peanut Butter Lover's Day
March 2nd Nat'l Old Stuff Day
March 3rd Nat'l 'I Want You to be Happy' Day
March 4th Nat'l Pound Cake Day
March 5th Nat'l Multiple Personality Day
March 6th Nat'l Frozen Food Day
March 7th Nat'l Be Heard Day
March 8th Nat'l Proofreading Day
March 9th Nat'l Barbie Day
March 10th Nat'l Pack Your Lunch Day
March 11th Nat'l Worship of Tools Day
March 12th Nat'l Plant a Flower Day
March 13th Nat'l Earmuff Day
March 14th Nat'l Potato Chip Day
March 15th Nat'l Everything You Think Is Wrong Day
March 16th Nat'l Artichoke Hearts Day
March 17th Nat'l Corned Beef & Cabbage Day
March 18th Nat'l Awkward Moments Day
March 19th Nat'l Poultry Day
March 20th Nat'l Proposal Day
March 21st My Birth Day!
March 22nd Nat'l Goof Off Day
March 23rd Nat'l Melba Toast Day
March 24th Nat'l Chocolate-Covered Raisin Day
March 25th Nat'l Tolkein Reading Day
March 26th Nat'l Spinach Day
March 27th Nat'l Joe Day
March 28th Nat'l Something on a Stick Day
March 29th Nat'l Little Red Wagon Day
March 30th Nat'l I Am in Control Day
March 31st Nat'l Bunsen Burner Day
Need I say more? Clearly, we've lost our minds as a nation. So which ones will you commemorate? I don't know about the rest of my family, but sign me up for March 30th.
Here's the real question--how the heck do these crazy days get placed on a calendar, or a website for that matter?
Answer: you simply register here.
I think it's free, but don't quote me on that. If you get charged for buying a star, I'm sure a fee is involved in buying a whole day. But rest assured that all applications submitted are confidential and fact-checked by Nat'l Day researchers (who gets that job?). Not only is your day recognized, but you also get a bunch of other perks, like a press release, inclusion on social media channels, and a freaking framed proclamation.
You should also note that there are limitations to this service. Nat'l Day Calendar folks do not declare National Days, Weeks or Months for (1) birthdays, (2) anniversaries or (3) individuals because that would involve an act of congress. Literally.
Well, that's probably enough March Madness. I will leave you with this one thought... National Tolkein Reading Day is really stupid because nobody can read Tolkein in a single 24-hour period. For heaven's sake, give the man a whole month!
|Credit: LOTR Wiki (One Wiki to Rule Them All)|